Sticky Scriptures: John 14:15
A Double Life
I was saved at a young age. I grew up in the church. I was heavily involved with youth group, was on the worship team, attended bible studies, went on mission trips - I was the “real deal.” My faith in Jesus goes back as far as I can remember. If you asked my closest friends and family, “Does Luke love Jesus?” they would not hesitate to say yes.
My struggle with porn also goes back a ways. There was a war raging over the affections of my soul beginning in my teenage years. On the one hand, I knew the gospel, and I yearned to be close to Jesus. I didn’t want anything to come between us. On the other hand was a desire for the “other woman” that had a stranglehold on my heart. I was living a double life (at least I was trying to). For a long time, I thought I could manage my dark secret. I didn’t think it was hurting anyone, and I believed God would understand. It wasn’t ideal, sure, but it was the best I could do.
Then one day I read Jesus’ words in John 14:15: “If you love me, you will keep my commandments.”
It hit me like a ton of bricks. I thought I did love Jesus, ask anyone! But if I was being honest with myself, I knew I definitely wasn’t keeping his commandments. So did that mean I didn’t love Jesus?
This led to many other questions. What exactly are the commandments of Jesus anyway? How do I know if I’ve “kept” them? Does Jesus expect complete perfection in order for me to be able to claim that I truly love him?
My hope is to address some of these concerns. I want to examine Jesus’ words from the perspective of a recovering sex addict. Let’s dig into this verse, seeking to faithfully understand and apply these precious but sobering words of Christ to our lives. Keep in mind, I will only be scratching the surface here. I encourage you to study this more in depth on your own.
The Commandments of Christ
So, what are the commandments of Jesus?
Various scholars have attempted to compile a list of Jesus’ commands. Some have put the number of commands coming directly from Christ at around fifty. We could also reasonably include the commands given by his apostles in the rest of the New Testament, which brings the number into the hundreds. But Jesus himself summarizes his commands (along with all the law and prophets of the Old Testament) with two overarching commandments: to love God with all your heart, soul, and mind, and to love your neighbor as yourself (Matt. 22:37-40).
If we look at the immediate context in John 14, and at parallel passages in 1 and 2 John, the command we find clearly repeated throughout is to love one another (specifically other brothers and sisters in the faith). Jesus also famously teaches us to love our enemies (Matt. 5:44). Essentially, the life of a genuine Christian should be characterized by love, both for Christ and for others.
This command is so central to the Christian faith that Jesus says the love Christians have for one another is how people outside the faith will know that we are his followers (John 13:35).
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So how does this relate to the struggle against sexual temptation and sin?
We know it’s not loving to your spouse to break your marriage vows. It’s not loving to your female “neighbor” to objectify her with your mind. It’s not loving to neglect your family and your local church fellowship when you inevitably isolate because of your sexual sin.
John 14:15 and other parallel passages make it clear that Christ actually has expectations for his followers. There is a certain way of living, a code of conduct, that pleases and honors Christ. His commandments are also for our good.
How Do I Know if I’ve “Kept” His Commandments?
“If you love me, you will keep my commandments,” is a high bar. In fact, if you’re anything like me, it seems a little too high. It sounds like Jesus is asking for perfection. The truth, though, is nobody has kept Jesus’ commands perfectly, and no one will.
If it’s truly impossible to perfectly keep his commands, then how do we know if we’ve “kept” them at all? A better question may be, what is the difference between keeping Jesus’ commands imperfectly and not keeping them at all?
The key difference is relationship.
Not long after Jesus declares to his disciples that if they love him, they will keep his commandments, he explains in John 15:1-10 that he is the true vine in which his followers are to abide:
“Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you unless you abide in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing…By this my Father is glorified that you bear much fruit and so prove to be my disciples…If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in his love.”
The Greek for abide means “to dwell”, “to remain", “to be present” much like one “abides” in his own house; it reveals one’s proximity to something or someone. Where are you in relation to Christ? Do you dwell in him or have you chosen repeatedly, without confession or repentance, to wander from him?
Keeping the commandments of Christ is a fruit of abiding in Him. If you don’t abide in him, you will not bear fruit (“…apart from me you can do nothing”). Obedience to Christ is the result of dwelling in him. He’s not saying, “First, obey me, and then you can abide in me.” It’s the exact opposite. We can only obey Jesus if we’re connected to him, much like the branch can only bear fruit if it’s connected to the vine.
We are bearing fruit because, as believers, we are attached to the vine. Our motivation for bearing fruit, i.e. for confessing our sins and repenting, is our love for Jesus. Our fruit shows us and those around us that we are connected to the vine. In other words, it shows that we are keeping his commandments, however imperfectly.
Abiding in Christ
Now, how do you abide in Christ?
John Piper, in his book All that Jesus Commanded, explains that abiding in Christ is essentially having a continual trust in his love and his words. It means believing moment by moment that we are truly loved by Him. We don’t let our circumstances shake that trust. We trust in God’s sovereignty, that no matter what happens, good or bad, he is working all things together for our good.
And remember, not only has Jesus saved you from your sin, not only has he met the perfect standard for you, he also keeps you abiding in him!
“My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all, and no one is able to snatch them out of the Father’s hand.” (John 10:27–29)
We need Jesus in order to be saved. We also need him in order to stay saved. If you are in Christ, he won’t let go of you.
The 12 Disciples and (Im)Perfection
Jesus’ twelve disciples are more like us than we think. They didn’t understand what Jesus meant much of the time, they had the audacity to ask for things that didn’t matter, they fought constantly amongst themselves, and ultimately, they all abandoned him.
For twelve men who regularly heard Jesus’ teachings - who heard the commandments directly from Christ’s own mouth and who lived and literally walked with the Son of God - their failures are painfully evident.
Yet this is everyone’s story, isn’t it?
“None is righteous, no, not one;
no one understands;
no one seeks for God.
All have turned aside; together they have become worthless;
no one does good,
not even one.”
…Apart from Christ.
Imagine being one of the disciples, following God’s only Son around the country. The contrast between their sin and his sinlessness would have been impossible to ignore. Jesus, being the only perfect person in history, would have had every right to chastise, berate and condemn his disciples for constantly being imperfect.
Instead, the Apostle John says that he (Jesus) was “full of grace and truth” (John 1:14). He was filled with love and compassion for them. Did you know John was the only disciple to stand at the foot of the cross - to return to Jesus after abandoning his Savior in the garden? John experienced first hand the life-changing power of the grace of Christ. This was his reason for writing 1 John, so that “your joy may be complete.” It’s why he says later on that the commandments of Christ are not burdensome (1 John 5:3).
After his resurrection, Christ tells the two women at the tomb,
“Do not be afraid; go and tell my brothers to go to Galilee, and there they will see me.”
Jesus called them “brothers,” even after their devastating betrayal. Their relationship with Christ made them his siblings, his co-heirs; by their faith they were adopted into the family of God.
When you finally rest in the love of Jesus, trusting in his promises and his will for your life, when you daily - even hourly - return to the life-giving fountain to “taste and see that he is good,” you will be changed. You will bear fruit. You will keep his commandments. You will be set free.
